Hands
by ehmaa
Summary: "Gray-sama!" The shriek penetrated his ears; it was filled with a mixture of pain and fear, just like last time. Worry blinded his eyes as he frantically searched around the cave, trying to find Juvia...his Juvia. [Gruvia One-shot.]


**Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail. All rights belong to Hiro Mashima.**

**AN:** A Gruvia one-shot with slight OOC.

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**Hands**

_"Gray-sama!"_

_The blunette said cheerfully standing in front of her favorite ice mage. Gray lifted his eyes to greet her, and was momentarily thrown off by her expression. Shining eager azure eyes locked with his. But what captivated him was her bright, warm, smile._

_"Would you accompany Juvia on a mission?" Realizing that he was staring, Gray sheepishly adverted his eyes, looking back down to his mug of beer._

_After a long mission with the team, he was planning to take a week off. With a sigh, he turned towards her, ready to decline her offer. Before he had a chance to mentally or physically prepare himself, that devil woman did the head tilt. The one that made her blue waves looked like real ones, framing her face in a way that made everything about her seem so pure and innocent. 'That sly woman.' She knew that he wouldn't be able to say no when she looked like _that.

_With a slight blush, much to his annoyance, he grumbled a small yeah, and stood up. He tried to look as nonchalant about it as possible, while Juvia bounced happily. Like if it was the most natural thing, Juvia held his hand, lacing their fingers together. Gray's eyes widened slightly at the contact. He looked down at their hands, then back up at her, and his heart skipped a beat. The water mage just smiled sweetly at him, and urged him to follow her as they walked out of the guild together. At that moment, as they made their way through town, Gray smiled slightly, 'Maybe the mission wasn't going to be too bad.'_

_And just as a flame could be easily blown out, the bright image of Juvia's smile diminished, and the warmth of her touch vanished. Darkness covered the scene, and an empty cold black cave embraced him instead._

_"No," he whispered. He felt the familiar fear and anxiety engulf him._

_"Gray-sama!"_

_The shriek penetrated his ears; it was filled with a mixture of pain and fear, just like last time. Worry blinded his eyes as he frantically searched around the cave, trying to find Juvia...his Juvia._

_"Juvia!" The urgent scream called back._

_Desperately Gray ran, trying to get to his nakama. His legs carried him to every corner of the cave, but there wasn't an exit. It was a dead end. The ice mage started to scan every rock and crack, trying to find a way out. This couldn't be happening to him. She was always by his side, _always_. He needed to find her._

_"GRAY-SAMA!" _

_Gray's body froze at the sound of the scream. At that moment his heart stopped and his stomach dropped. Unlike the previous one, this scream seemed more terrified; it seemed to be in pure agony. Just like a magical blast, the reality of the situation hit him. _

_"JUVIA!"_

_His scream was far beyond desperate. No matter how anguished his shouts were, or how much he kept calling her, they were all swallowed away by the cave's echo. His voice would never reach her. It was too late, he was too late. Falling onto his knees, he allowed the darkness to engulf him once more._

Gray shot up from the bed, beads of sweat covered his body. Frantically, his onyx eyes searched the room. He felt his heart pumping rapidly, as if it was ready to jump out of his chest. The bed became uncomfortably hot and suffocating, so Gray threw the sheets to the side and stood up. He ran his fingers through his messy jet black hair, letting out a shaky breath.

He looked down at his hands and clenched them until they turned white. For five agonizing nights, he had the same dream. Every night the dream would become more vivid. Her screams intensified, and his entire body ached with urgency to find her, to hold her. Never in his life, not even when Ur died, did the urge of holding someone's hand, consumed him so much, than in that moment. He just wanted her soft dainty hands laced with his.

Gray unclenched his hands and stared down at his palms. His eyes grew cold and disgusted by the sight of them. They taunted him, loving the pain they caused him and enjoyed reminding him what a piece of shit he truly was. Every time he looked at his hands, he was reminded of all the misery he endured in his life. His hands were murderers, ice cold murderers. They didn't do anything, and allowed his parents away to be taken away, the same with Ur, and now with _her_. It was their fault, all their fault. They allowed her to die. He screamed in frustration, and punched the wall, creating a dent. They weren't strong enough to save her.

The ice mage began to break and throw whatever was closet to him. Shattered glass and wood were scattered on the floor. The furniture was barely recognizable. His entire apartment was in ruins, thanks to his rampages, which were now a normal habit. He'd go on a frenzy, doing anything to try to punish those two bastards. They deserved to feel the pain that he felt everyday without her. They needed to know she's gone because of them.

With nothing else left to break, Gray stumbled into his small bathroom. He didn't even bother looking at the mirror. He was already disgusted with his hands, he wasn't ready to face the man who owned them. The black haired mage stepped into the shower, and with the twist of the knob the water poured down. His eyes were lifeless, as the water cascaded down his naked body. He stood there for what felt like hours, letting the scorching hot water burn him. Slowly he brought his hands to eye level. They were red from the hot water and blood, and were covered in bruises. He cupped them and watched as the water gathered in a small pool, soothing the evil bastards.

Gray extended his hands, allowing the water to run in between his fingers. As much as he hated them, he couldn't understand how they also brought him so much joy in his life? They allowed him to do magic. That rush of adrenaline and euphoria that shot through his body every-time he conjured his magic, were all done by them. With those hands he found his true passion, protecting his nakama, Fairy Tail. He also fought alongside her, intertwining their hands. Those hands held the most precious things in his life. Gray held_ her_ hand, with them.

The water dripped from his fingers, and fell into the drain. As much as he tried, the water never felt the same. No water felt the same as Juvia's water. Her water was warm, soothing, and filled with life. This water was just hot and dead. An evil whisper, in his mind, said the awful truth,_ 'It's dead. Just like her.'_

Twisting the knob, the water stopped. The mage just stood there for a while, not finding a reason to leave the steamed shower. He looked down at his raw red hands and his eyebrows furrowed a bit. They were...wet. By now his body was completely dried up, so his hands should have been dried as well. He looked up at the shower head, but there wasn't any leaks. New drops of water fell into his palms. Bringing his fingers to his cheeks, he felt the warm trail of his tears. He was crying.

As much as he tried to keep a cold exterior, he finally melted. His lower lip quivered and his hands began to shake. Since her death, he didn't shed a single tear, not even at her funeral. But now, tears poured out from his eyes. His body trembled and he began to loose his balance. Sobs racked his body, as he slid down the shower wall tiles.

_"Juvia,"_ he managed to say in a broken voice. Tears blurred his vision, and he looked at his hands once more. Maybe he'll let those bastards comfort him, at least for tonight. Closing his eyes, he tried to remember her smile, trying to find some comfort in the image. However, that cause even more pain. His heart felt like it was being stabbed multiple times; he missed Juvia so much.

With his hands, he covered his eyes, and cried. He cried for his loss, for Juvia's loss. Gray cried because he never told her he loved her; never gave them a proper chance. But ultimately he cried because he was weak.

_Just like his hands were._

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**AN:**

This is my first Gruvia one-shot, and I have no idea where the angst came from. I apologize if I made Gray OOC, I just felt that it went with the scene.

I hope you enjoyed it! Feedback is always welcomed!

Thank you!

**ehmma**

03.09.14


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